It was only a matter of time before it happened, and of course it absolutely had to happen in the state of Florida.
Newsweek reports that a man was arrested for trying to steal 66 rolls of toilet paper from a Marriott hotel:
“Angel Esteban Hernandezcinto, 31, was arrested in the early morning hours of Thursday after police responded to security guard Yamil Egipciaco’s call complaining that a man was stealing toilet paper from the hotel. At 1:30 a.m., the guard said he was on regular patrols when he noticed suspicious activity from Hernandezcinto, according to an arrest affidavit.
“‘Yamil saw Angel pushing a trash can toward his Honda van,’ the arresting officer wrote in the affidavit. ‘Angel opened the rear of the van and took a trash bag from the trash can and put it in his van. Yamil found it suspicious as to why he put a trash bag in his van and peaked through the window. Yamil noticed the bag was full of unused toilet paper that belonged to the hotel.'”
How did the man get into the Marriott in the first place? Was he staying there? Nope. Turns out he was working for the cleaning company that services the hotel when he tried to lift the TP, which is valued at about $65, except when it’s sold on the booming toilet paper black market, which there are reports that one roll can go for as much as $200 a roll, according to the Daily Mail:
“Rolls of toilet paper are being sold for extortionate prices on websites such as eBay, Gumtree, and Facebook’s Marketplace.
“One advertisement on Facebook listed a single roll for $100, while another was seemingly charging $200.”
When he was caught with the stolen TP, Hernandezcinto claimed he was taking it to give to an elderly neighbor.
Despite his supposed generosity toward his neighbor, Hernandezcinto was charged with theft from a public lodging facility, which happens to be a felony in the Sunshine State. He was released on $2,500 bond once all of the relevant paperwork had been completed and signed.
Ah, Florida, what would we do without you? Then again, what are we gonna do when our TP runs out? Guess we’ll have to make a reservation at a local motel or hotel and take the paper products with us when we leave.