Believe it or not, there’s actually a book out which mentions Donald Trump multiple times that he isn’t trying to block in court, but after he finds out what’s in the tome, he may wish he had.

The book, entitled The Art of Her Deal: The Untold Story of Melania Trump, is filled with all sorts of embarrassing nuggets which are sure to enrage the president, who will probably try to blame it all on the author.

For example, the First Lady admitted that she often gives the Donald tips on how to look better when he’s being photographed, The Daily Beast reports:

“Melania may dole out suggestions on how Trump can use his tongue to ‘tighten and define’ facial muscles while smiling, and how to look thinner in photos. Of course, as the evidence shows, her husband might not always follow the former model’s honed rules. Melania may be the teacher, but she has said it is ‘up to him’ as a student to deliver on the lessons.

There’s also the time Melania had to defend Donnie’s manhood.

It seems that some of the First Lady’s friends were making fun of her husband’s small hands, to which she angrily responded:

“Don’t say this – he’s a real man.”

Actually, he’s a man-baby, and the size of his endowment certainly doesn’t make him behave like an adult.

The First Lady has also, according to the book, been involved in “stage-managing” the president’s movements:

“At the 2018 state dinner she organized for the French president Emmanuel Macron and his wife Brigitte, she was overheard ‘stage-managing Trump’s movements, as one person described it.'”

It’s perfectly normal for a spouse to give their significant other suggestions on how to present a better public image. That’s just part of marriage.

But the part about trying to make someone as obviously obese as Donald Trump look “thinner” is downright laughable. How exactly does one accomplish that? Have him wear dark colors? Trump does that all the time. Stay behind his desk most of the day? He does that, too!

If indeed Melania is trying to help present the image that her husband isn’t overweight, she’s failing miserably. Maybe next time she can aim for making him behave like a better person instead of a bullying braggart. Good luck with that!